Due to shortages in men in the Greater Phoenix Area, the following categories of unforgivable lowlifes have been promoted to “potential relationship material” for me:
Liars
Cheaters
Drug abusers. Yep, that includes you pot heads
Pedifiles
Women haters
Women beaters
Men who don’t speak English
Felons
Divorced men
Homeless
My intellectual inferiors
Dirty, smelly coffee shop poets
Barflies
Possessive types
Men old enough to be my Dad
Anyone else in my family, including the remains of my dead grandfather
Lawyers
People who can’t spell and refuse to use spell check
Negative, angry types
bisexual
Politicians/the criminally insane
Smokers who pretend to be nonsmokers
Vain, selfcentered artists
Drama queens
Guys who always get dumped and can’t figure out why
The dentalhygienically challenged
Players
Polygamists
Communist
Republicans
Anyone with that shiteating fetish
Pig Fuckers
Pink shirt wearing corporate capitalist dick heads who drive fancy cars
Free loaders
Your dumb friend, age 37, who still plays video games after work
Anyone with 2 or more first names
Anyone with a toupee
The insecure
Misers
Humorless types
Mama’s Boys
Egomaniacs
Sex addicts
Poseurs
Infantile fuckwits who blame everyone else for their problems
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